(for Saturnus Devorator)

Thank you for patience while you wait.
How can I be of service today?
It's sounding like you hit a bitter break,
a little bad luck, and floundered in the wake.
Anyone in your position quakes when this
game of chance has gone and raised the stakes.
Maybe I can help you find a way
to bear and pass this infernal weight?

I'll assume that you're familiar with
the range of services that I'm prepared to give.
Never fear—the cons are utter myth.
Stretch your legs and live a little bit.
All you need to know is what you want.
Make a list. Check a box.
Run the costs. Cut your losses.
Bear the load. Slough it off.

Anything you think you can’t afford
can soon be yours with just a simple signature.
Revel in the blessed peace of mind
that falls in line with having anything you want.
But just remember when we've run our course
that you won't forget me on the other shore:
Nothing's free in this world—just some lines of
credit that you've got to pay for.

You've got six feet to the flatline,
Six feet to the endzone.
Six feet til the flesh lies in that fresh pine
and you're dead and gone.
In that six feet you can have anything
In the world you could ever want, but—
You've got to be willing.

Frankly, I'm surprised to see your call.
Glad to see you gave a second thought.
Callers often balk at modest flaws,
easily succumbing to a fear of God,
afraid to draw the lines toward the fault
when the fact of the matter hazards all:
You're in a maze with a minotaur,
and this ain't a place you can safely walk.

Face it, the simple twist of fate's even
hardliners stand to fall from grace
when they finally parse the law in all its cases
and stretch the leash to put it through its paces.
Measure up the academic's proof
And you'll find the logic's just a clever ruse:
Beg the question then contort the rules.
What exactly do you have to lose?

Everything. Me, I merely let the
puppet feel the weight of lighter strings,
get a taste for the finer things,
save the days from a spate of waste.
As they say the world's a stage. What's the use in
suffering someone else design the play?
Write the action that you long to see.
Leave the messy ending up to me.

All I need is your consent. Proxy for
the signature is in the fingertip.
Lock it in with just a simple gesture.
Lift a digit up and press the 6.
But just remember when we've run our course,
that you won't forget me on the other shore:
Nothing's free in this world—just some lines of
credit that you've got to pay for.

Do not neglect debts that you owe.
Do not forget tabs that you run.
Do not get out of jail free for none.
Do not expect rest for those bones.
Do not pass GO. Do not pass GO.